Gemini | Greenland Sharks & Questionable Hostel Romance

The Greenland shark’s patience is contagious this Saturday, Gemini – a chilling reminder that the universe rewards stillness, particularly when you’re contemplating the alarming decline of decent conversation. Venus is currently attempting a synchronized dance with the ninth house, promising encounters with bafflingly opinionated strangers and, if you’re lucky (or recklessly optimistic), a vacation romance fueled by questionable hostel breakfasts. Don’t chase fleeting pleasures; instead, cultivate the art of being delightfully bored, and consider investing that grant money in a very small, very grumpy llama – you’ll need a distraction from the inevitable realization that everyone is just trying to subtly monetize their existence.